Promoting Self-Esteem and Self-Love.
When I was younger, I was so shy, I found it even hard to say ‘hello’ to people. I always waited for someone else to say ‘hello’ first. Even at the checkout in the supermarket, I always waited for the cashier to speak to me first. Unless you’ve been painfully shy, you really don’t understand how hard it is, for shy people to speak up and take the lead and initiate a conversation. Self-worth comes from within and it doesn’t matter how others see you or how you outwardly see yourself, anyone can experience shyness, anxiety and self-worth issues.
I was especially quiet and shy in group situations with people I did not know well, and the anxiety that gripped me if I even had to announce my name was overwhelming. On the scale of shyness, I was off the scale! People have even assumed that I was a snob because I never spoke much, not understanding that I didn’t speak because I had no self-worth, self-esteem and I always felt that my opinions, thoughts and perspectives would be judged and termed wrong if they were different to others. It took me a long time to understand that different does not mean wrong. It took me a long time to realise that my thoughts, feelings, perspectives and opinions are just as valid and are just as important as anyone else’s.
In my experience, overcoming shyness is a lot about learning to like and accept yourself exactly as you are, and believing in yourself. it’s about learning to speak up and it means recognising your thoughts, opinions, perspectives and feelings are just as important as anyone else’s. It means starting to take those little steps every day to speak up. Say ‘hello’ to someone else first, initiate a conversation with a stranger and stop worrying about what everyone else thinks. It means recognising you’re equal to other people. And to treat yourself, like you would treat your best friend. We all have different strengths, unique qualities, and everyone has a story! A lot of people are actually very surprised when they take the time to listen to someone else’s story, and understand that person’s experiences and background.
I learnt how to speak up, but it’s not an easy road. I didn’t start my self-love and self-confidence journey until around 10 years ago, and I am finally proud of where I am at. A friend of mine calls me the chasm jumper in the self-growth stakes.
I was around 39 years of age, when I ended my marriage, and I decided I wanted to be done with the shyness and social anxiety, and I have been working on myself ever since, undertaking training, classes, and courses in professional and personal self-development. I learnt to love and approve of myself, faults and all.
It’s a journey, but the self-growth game is worth it. I am still working on myself, and I feel like it’s a lifelong journey.
I’ve been through some very challenging personal experiences, including surviving breast cancer and living through the horrific 2009 Black Saturday Bushfires, to name a couple, and these experiences changed my whole outlook and perspective on life.
If you’re reading this and you ‘get it’, my heart goes out to you. I want you to know that reducing social anxiety and shyness gets easier with practice, and you can learn to love yourself and believe in yourself, but results don’t happen overnight. It’s a journey where you decide to keep taking steps to reduce and overcome it, and you don’t give up. I want to tell you that if you resonate with what I’ve written, I believe in you and I know that you can find the courage to reduce and overcome your shyness and social anxiety too.
If I can do it, so can you.
In 2018, Confidently Introverted was established. It was because I wanted to help and empower other people. I wanted to help people to love themselves more. I wanted to help people that suffered from shyness, social anxiety and low self esteem to know & believe that it was possible to overcome the fears and thoughts about themselves that hold them back in life. I wanted them to know that they can develop self confidence and self belief and self acceptance so they can stand up for themselves, participate and speak up in groups, know that their opinions, thoughts and perspectives are just as important as anyone else’s and not be scared of what others think of them so they can live their best life and live up to their greatest potential.
Why? Because I suffered from the lowest self esteem, the most terrible social anxiety, and my own hatred for myself throughout my younger years. And when I lived through horrendous personal events where I had to face my own mortality, I promised god if I could live, I would use the rest of my life for good. And this is why I started Confidently Introverted, it was a way of giving back in my own way to the world to try to make a positive difference. I’m not sure if I’ve really figured it all out, all’s I’ve ever wanted is to feel like I’m making a positive difference in this world and to other people’s lives.
Thanks to everyone for reading my blog and visiting my page. Thanks for all of your likes, shares, follows, comments, and subscribes, you give me the motivation and passion to keep going and keep putting myself out there to share part of myself and hopefully help and inspire you and other’s to live their best lives
Love Alison, and the Confidently Introverted Team. xx
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